Good City, M.a.a.d TrollBag

Daniel tackles the first-ever MLB Playoffs TrollBag. (Title credit to Frank Stevens)

Photo courtesy of Kelly O’Connor.

First things first: RED SOX PLAYOFF BASEBALL! How great is this?!

As I write this paragraph, the Sox lead the Rays in Game 2, 5-1, following yet another Stephen Drew triple (he does that often). This coming after a 12-2 romp at Fenway yesterday… well, I haven’t felt so good about a playoff game in any sport since Paul Pierce hit that three in LeBron James’s face in Game 5 of the Eastern Conference Finals.

I had a great revelation this past week, though: it’s time for a TrollBag. Quite frankly, I was tremendously excited to be writing one of these… whatever-you-want-to-call-thems as the Sox face off with a divisional rival in a playoff series.

You guys didn’t disappoint me, that’s for sure.

Here we go.

Get out.

You really have to admire Ron Washington’s dedication to bunting despite managing in the American League, where there is virtually no real incentive to do so. On a similar note, was Dusty Baker’s the least surprising thing to happen over the past couple weeks? I think so.

That said, I don’t really know their meal schedules, so I couldn’t tell you who the “great-eat” manager of 2013 might be.


I have no objection to this.

Well Matt, it seems like its almost certainly going to be Will Middlebrooks at this moment. His second-half numbers (.276/.329/.476, 7% BB%, ..344 wOBA) were a wonderful improvement over his terrible start, and would make him more than deserving of a lineup spot over a full season. Notably, I’d like to spotlight that walk rate, which was an almost 3% increase over his beginning mark. An improved approach at the plate from Will would make me a very happy Red Sox fan.

Additionally, Bogaerts has a shot to open next season as our starting shortstop. A lot will depend on Stephen Drew and whether or not the Red Sox choose to bring him back next season. Personally, I wouldn’t want to bring Drew back for more than one year, mainly because I want Xander to start at short as soon as possible.

Either way, I don’t think Bogaerts starting at third is likely at this stage, but anything can happen. Having that kind of flexibility is nice.

I…. what…?

I’ve been looking at this tweet for days, you guys. I still don’t understand it.

Somebody please help me.

He’s doing pretty well in my OOTP league. He hit three home runs in the first game.

If only Real Jackie would do that…

Whichever one he ended up using, he chose correctly. Yeesh.

It’s worth mentioning that Scherzer’s career is starting to remind me an awful lot of fellow Tigers starter Justin Verlander’s – he’s a high-strikeout guy with some early career walk issues who probably hadn’t quite gotten enough attention before his big breakout year. While he’s not quite the innings-eater Verlander is, Scherzer’s turned himself into something of a force of nature on the mound. That the Tigers hit on two of those guys so close together is kind of ridiculous.

That said, rumors of Justin Verlander’s demise have been greatly exaggerated.

The better question is: how soon until the Dodgers do it again?

What you meant to ask was “Would Brian McCann preserve the integrity of the game in Boston?”

The answer to that is “Of course.”

Also, McCann’s beard is a little pitiful compared to the Red Sox, so maybe that would give him some added motivation.

I debated about this one for quiet a while, and I think I’ve settled on some good ‘ol homemade moonshine.

I’ll be honest, most of this is probably due to the beards, but I still think it’s a good comparison. This Red Sox team is (to use a forbidden word) gritty, not exactly the most attractive out there statistically, but when it comes to winning/getting drunk, it sure gets the job done.

But mostly, it’s the beards.


Kim seems to have entered the “anger” phase of Barry Zito recovery.

It’s gonna be okay, Kim, I promise. He’ll have an ERA over five next year.

Sarcastic Wil Myers chants: great thing, or best thing?

Man, you guys really went to town on Joe Maddon this week, huh?

And for the record, I don’t know who would be best suited to hit at him, but I’m confident Dustin Pedroia would be the most likely.

*awkward silence*

Now, I have no reason for thinking this, but the first thing that popped into my head was the Trans-Siberian Orchestra.

But really, wouldn’t Koji running out to TSO be totally awesome? Of course it would.

Josh went really heavy on the toilet humor this time around. I’m just gonna leave these here and refrain from commenting.

(I did laugh, because I’m 12)

Better men than me have died trying to find out.

This. Photo courtesy of Kelly O’Connor.

Happy playoffs, guys!

Categories: Barry Zito Boston Red Sox Jackie Bradley Jr. Koji Uehara Stephen Drew Will Middlebrooks Xander Bogaerts

I'm currently an undergraduate Multimedia Journalism major at Virginia Tech and, with over 630 followers, you could say I'm kind of a big deal on Twitter dot com. I'm Fire Brand's Monday columnist, the creator of the TrollBag (sorry about that) and also the guy who writes those polls every week. I tweet far too much, but you should follow me anyways.

One Response to “Good City, M.a.a.d TrollBag” Subscribe

  1. evanbrunell October 6, 2013 at 2:02 PM #

    That question by the robot is amazing.