Apologies to those that don’t follow the shows I do, but I was thinking about the multitude of TV shows that I watch and I thought it would be pretty funny and cool to pair up who I think represents a certain character best on the Red Sox. I’m not limiting this to one show (but am limiting it to shows currently on the air), so… let’s check out my comparisons. In the comments, leave your own!

SHOW: 24
PERSON: JACK BAUER
RED SOX: JOSH BECKETT
How is Josh Beckett NOT Jack Bauer? He wasted his life away in a hot climate in the south (Beckett Florida, Bauer Los Angeles), losing everyone that ever mattered to him. Then they moved (Beckett to Boston, Bauer to Africa and now Washington D.C.). Bauer and Beckett are a no-nonsense, take-no-prisoners people who will, at the end of the day, get the job done.
SHOW: LOST
PERSON: JACK SHEPHARD
RED SOX: JOSH BARD
Shephard and Bard both came to new locations (The Island, Boston) and tried to forge a new living, but quickly found that evil lurked. Shephard had to deal with The Others, while Bard had the big bad knuckleball. They finally escaped, but both people couldn’t resist the siren call of their former home.
SHOW: The Office
PERSON: DWIGHT SCHRUTE
RED SOX: JONATHAN PAPELBON
Dwight has a job that’s pretty small in stature while Papelbon has a pretty big job… but they’re both invaluable in the role they serve. Oh, and both of them are hilariously funny and cocky as all hell.
SHOW: Family Guy
PERSON: STEWIE GRIFFIN
RED SOX: DUSTIN PEDROIA
Both Pedroia and Stewie are very short and are babies (Pedroia in the sense that he’s turning 3 in major league service time)… it doesn’t stop both of them from trying to take over the world, though. (What else can Pedroia possibly win? Hmm… maybe he’s already taken over the world.) There’s that whole funny thing, too.
SHOW: Rescue Me
PERSON: CHIEF JERRY REILLY
RED SOX: JASON VARITEK
Chief Reilly and Jason Varitek were both aging, holding onto jobs that they maybe can’t quite do efficiently anymore. Both have their marital issues, and for those who know what happened to Reilly, Varitek may mirror his quick exit. (Hey, not all comparisons are roses.)
SHOW: Heroes
PERSON: PETER PETRELLI
RED SOX: CLAY BUCHHOLZ
Poor Peter, poor Clay. All they want to do is save the world. Peter had immense expectations heaped upon him after doing just that in season one, as did Buchholz after throwing the no-hitter. Both are still trying to find their way.
SHOW: Law and Order: SVU
PERSON: ELLIOT STABLER
RED SOX: KEVIN YOUKILIS
Stabler and Youkilis are both very dedicated to their craft. They’ve caught a lot of flak from people for their attitude and investment in the job. They come across as mean S.O.B.’s, but that’s what makes them so good.
SHOW: Fringe
PERSON: WALTER BISHOP
RED SOX: DAISUKE MATSUZAKA
Both of them are a little screwy in the head… of course, Bishop’s was for being locked away in a psychiatric facility. Who knows what goes through Dice-K’s mind that causes him to give up so many walks. And yet: both of them are the key to the whole thing.
SHOW: My Name is Earl
PERSON: EARL HICKEY
RED SOX: ROCCO BALDELLI
Earl has had a checkered past; so has Rocco (injuries). Earl now is working off a list, hoping that by healing those he has hurt, karma will smile on him. Rocco’s doing just the same, coming back home to his local roots, hoping karma smiles on him.
SHOW: Curb Your Enthusiasm
PERSON: LARRY DAVID
RED SOX: J.D. DREW
Larry David keeps finding himself in crazy and weird situations. That’s a good way to describe Drew’s (a) injury history and (b) ability to come roaring back, as evidenced by the $14-million grand slam.
SHOW: Dexter
PERSON: DEXTER MORGAN
RED SOX: DAVID ORTIZ
Both of them put on a great facade. They’re friendly, great guys who you would love to spend time with. Until they kill you. Dexter with a knife, Ortiz with a game-winning home run.

Ignoring for a second the fact that I watch way too many TV shows, hope some (or all) of these comparisons brought a chuckle to you guys. Leave your own comparisons in the comments!